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Severance Pay (NSFL: Not Suitable For Lunchtime)

14th February 2018 by Sarah Leave a Comment

I’m not a fan of people having bits chopped off onscreen even if they’re really evil, in which case chop off all the bits, just do it in another room. But I’ve noticed a trend in movies that takes giving someone the finger to a whole new level. Yes, digit-docking is a thing. You can see… Severance Pay (NSFL: Not Suitable For Lunchtime) Read More

Filed Under: Film Articles Tagged With: a girl walks home alone at night, finger chopped off, shape of water, the english patient, the hitcher, the piano, warlock, wolf creek, Your Move

2018 Movies – The Ones To Watch (And Then Watch)

3rd January 2018 by Sarah Leave a Comment

How quickly we move on – I’m not at the “John Wick who?” stage yet, but there are so many new movies to look forward to. These are some of my most anticipated films of 2018, and it’s fair to say that sweaters, sci fi and prehistoric sharks feature quite heavily. 1. Destination Wedding Everyone’s… 2018 Movies – The Ones To Watch (And Then Watch) Read More

Filed Under: Film Articles Tagged With: 2018 movies, a quiet place, aquaman, black panther, den of thieves, destination wedding, jurassic world fallen kingdom, keepers, meg, ones to watch, phantom thread, replicas

Marshmallow Movies – That Sinking Feeling, But In A Good Way

13th November 2017 by Sarah Leave a Comment

Twinsets, bonnets, women behaving appallingly who I’ll make endless excuses for, bearded men in chunky knitwear, spaceships, middle-aged sex, Santa and Satan. These are the ingredients I need in my own marshmallow movies. But a marshmallow movie can be any genre, from tear-stained family drama to zombies in space. They may be sweet but it’s more a… Marshmallow Movies – That Sinking Feeling, But In A Good Way Read More

Filed Under: Film Articles Tagged With: 300, constantine, event horizon, film stars don't die in liverpool, girls trip, love and friendship, love witch, marshmallow movies, sweet virginia, their finest

If Gerard Butler Worked In My Office

23rd September 2017 by Sarah 4 Comments

"Look I ordered an american accent a week ago with Amazon Prime and it's still not here!"

Let’s face it, office life can be a bit dull. Times have changed and with a new more rigorous business culture you can’t even get pissed at lunchtime and photocopy your boobs anymore without some wet blanket reporting you for ink wastage. So just imagine if a really hot guy worked in your office. Tall, strong,… If Gerard Butler Worked In My Office Read More

Filed Under: Film Articles Tagged With: 300, Coriolanus, Gerard butler, gerry butler, if gerard butler worked in my office, london has fallen, memes, office life, work

Once More Onto The Beach Dear Friends… Yes Let’s Talk About Dunkirk

31st July 2017 by Sarah 4 Comments

This is a fight for freedom – freedom to diss aspects of Dunkirk! And to rewrite famous Shakespearean quotes for my own nefarious purposes too. It’s okay, I’ve got my flak jacket, I’m lying on the ground with my hands over my ears, and I’m primed for two weeks of fallout. Plus I’m British so I’ve… Once More Onto The Beach Dear Friends… Yes Let’s Talk About Dunkirk Read More

Filed Under: Film Articles Tagged With: 51st Highlanders, dunkirk, dunkirk movie, Indian soldiers at Dunkirk, women at Dunkirk

Apparently It’s National Orgasm Day! Though That Could Be Fake News

31st July 2017 by Sarah Leave a Comment

I’ll have what she’s having.

Filed Under: Film Articles Tagged With: billy crystal, fake news, meg ryan, meg ryan orgasm, national orgasm day, when harry met sally, when harry met sally restaurant scene

It’s International Women’s Day! Hear Me Roar Like The T-Rex In Jurassic Park

8th March 2017 by Sarah Leave a Comment

"Smile! This is for our 'Wanted For Crimes Against Masculinity' poster"

Yes, it’s that day again when all the mysogynists pop up to ask when International Men’s Day is. So come on over and tell me how to be a feminist. Just kidding, I can google. Once I’ve stopped Hoovering anyway. Also if you remind me I’ll do a post on IMD which is on 19th November. As long… It’s International Women’s Day! Hear Me Roar Like The T-Rex In Jurassic Park Read More

Filed Under: Film Articles Tagged With: alien, aliens, hidden figures, international women's day, jane austen, jurassic park, Jurassic world, ripley, sense and sensibility, thelma and louise

10 What’s With Wick Moments From John Wick 1

24th February 2017 by Sarah 1 Comment

John breathes a sigh of relief. The guns were all still there, and the chocolate coins were just a welcome bonus

*** Check out the new trailer for John Wick 3: Parabellum, plus new poster *** Admit it – now John Wick: Chapter 2 is out you’ve all been (a) rewatching John Wick for the 10th time or (b) watching John Wick for the first time but you can’t tell anyone because you’ve been pretending for… 10 What’s With Wick Moments From John Wick 1 Read More

Filed Under: Film Articles Tagged With: action thriller, assassin, chad stahelski, continental hotel, daisy the dog, gun fu, hitmen, john wick, john wick 1, keanu, keanu reeves, miss perkins, noir, perkins, red circle, revenge, viggo tarosov

Wick did WHAT?? 10 Things That Made Me Go Whoa! In John Wick Chapter 2

17th February 2017 by Sarah 1 Comment

Fighting off 100 contract killers was nothing to the pain of the hair tong burns while being prepped for his "continental quarterly" cover

So you’ve enjoyed / endured two years of anticipation building up to the sequel to John Wick. You’ve watched trailers, teaser trailers, and tailor teaser trailers. You’ve taken a leaf out of your hero Keanu’s book and defended Wick against all-comers, while wearing a tapered suit and looking battered-yet-sexy. I didn’t see John Wick until it… Wick did WHAT?? 10 Things That Made Me Go Whoa! In John Wick Chapter 2 Read More

Filed Under: Film Articles Tagged With: bowery king, chad stahelski, excommunicado, john wick, john wick 3, john wick chapter 2, john wick chapter 3, keanu reeves, the continental

Comfort Blanket Movies For When The World Is Going To Hell In A Handcart (i.e. Now)

31st January 2017 by Sarah Leave a Comment

Handing out her "end of days" to-do lists Fiona explained that being left behind during "The Rapture" didn't simply mean a disappointing wedding night

The world is pretty dark right now, but once you’ve filled your understairs cupboard with cans of baked beans, plus that Long Life UHT milk that come the Apocalypse no one will actually drink (“things are bad enough, I’ll have that cold coffee black if you don’t mind”), you’ll need something to fill the time before the… Comfort Blanket Movies For When The World Is Going To Hell In A Handcart (i.e. Now) Read More

Filed Under: Film Articles Tagged With: airplane, american werewolf in london, apocalypse, comfort blanket films, comfort movies, dark days, end of days, end of the world, favourite films, four weddings and a funeral, hugh grant, john wick, jurassic park, keanu reeves, kristin scott thomas, leslie nielsen, lofty pythons life of brian, naked gun, prometheus, reign of fire, ripley, yorkshire

NOISE COMPLAINT? Hell Yeah! John Wick’s Symphony Of Violence & A Poem

16th January 2017 by Sarah Leave a Comment

The Wick is Re-Lit

Want to see John Wick shooting his load over and over again? OF COURSE YOU DO! The new John Wick Symphony of Violence is filled with deaths from the original John Wick, set to Tchaikovsky’s 1812 Overture Finale. This is NOT another John Wick: Chapter 2 trailer, as let’s face it, if they drop many more trailers we’ll… NOISE COMPLAINT? Hell Yeah! John Wick’s Symphony Of Violence & A Poem Read More

Filed Under: Film Articles Tagged With: 1812 overture, john wick, john wick 2, john wick killings, john wick poem, john wick shootings, john wick symphony of violence, keanu, keanu reeves, miss perkins, mr wick, poem, supercut, symphony of violence, Tchaikovsky, the continental

Happy Friday the 13th!

13th January 2017 by Sarah Leave a Comment

One is a terrifying abomination that haunts my dreams, and the other is Jason Voorhees from Friday the 13th

Obviously by happy I don’t actually mean happy. It is Friday the 13th after all. Just make sure you don’t slip over on the ice today perusing my website, and break your neck. Oh.

Filed Under: Film Articles Tagged With: croc shoes, crocs, friday 13th, friday the thirteenth, horror, horror film, horror franchise, horror movies, horror sequels, jason, jason voorheen, movie serial killers

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About Sarah

About Sarah

Rotten Tomatoes-approved critic, John Wick lover and Gerard Butler apologist. Still waiting for Mike Banning vs John Wick: Requiem

Site info here.
Or email me on [email protected]

Reviews

The Bounty Hunter 2.5 stars☆☆☆☆☆

One True Loves 3 stars☆☆☆☆☆

John Wick: Chapter 4 4.5 stars☆☆☆☆☆

Visualization (short film) Short Film 3 stars☆☆☆☆☆

Follow The Dead 3 stars☆☆☆☆☆

Plane 4 stars☆☆☆☆☆

Netflix and chill: the film club discusses The Pale Blue Eye 3 stars☆☆☆☆☆

See How They Run 3.5 stars☆☆☆☆☆

Maneater 2 stars☆☆☆☆☆

Clarkson’s Farm (TV series, season 1) 4.5 stars☆☆☆☆☆

The Reef: Stalked 3 stars☆☆☆☆☆

Persuasion 2 stars☆☆☆☆☆

GATLOPP: Hell Of A Game 3 stars☆☆☆☆☆

Jurassic World: Dominion 2.5 stars☆☆☆☆☆

Top Gun: Maverick 5 stars☆☆☆☆☆

Senior Year 3 stars☆☆☆☆☆

H20h no! The Film Club watches Black Water: Abyss 2 stars☆☆☆☆☆

Why Didn’t They Ask Evans? (TV mini series) 4 stars☆☆☆☆☆

Sonic The Hedgehog 2 3 stars☆☆☆☆☆

Pursuit Of A Jigsaw (short film) Short Film 4 stars☆☆☆☆☆

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