*** My review and article are now live – also the UK release is now 11 March, for home rental ***
“Oi, how many arses have you got?” asks Paxton of a loo roll stockpiler coming out of shop in London during Lockdown 1.0.
Despite its UK lockdown hook, Locked Down is actually a heist movie – a Harrods heist movie, no less – as a warring couple, unwillingly stuck in a house together during the pandemic, put aside their differences to try to steal a massive diamond.
Unsurprisingly considering the trailer came out only a day or two after Boris plunged us back into a UK-wide lockdown, much of the social media response to the new trailer has been of the “read the room (we retreated to months ago)” variety, though unlike last year’s rather earnest pandemic movie Songbird, this looks funny, and has a very British sensibility to it.

Here’s the synopsis:
In LOCKED DOWN, just as they decide to separate, Linda and Paxton find life has other plans when they are stuck at home in a mandatory lockdown. Co-habitation is proving to be a challenge, but fuelled by poetry and copious amounts of wine, it will bring them closer together in the most surprising way.
Locked Down is directed by Doug Liman from a script by Steven Knight. Co-starring with Ejiofor and Hathaway are Mindy Kaling, Stephen Merchant, Lucy Boynton, Dulé Hill, Jazmyn Simon, Ben Stiller and Academy Award® winner Ben Kingsley.

The film premieres on HBO Max on 14 January with a UK release on 5 March, presumably in cinemas if we’re allowed out by then.