Would you bloody believe it! Dublin is awash with the undead. Very spoilery on family, the ending and who dies when (if you’re after my review, it’s here)
The vampire story is an allegory for, and runs parallel to, the exclusion Deco and Shelia feel. Both Deco and Sheila feel neglected and abandoned by their families, though both have behaved badly and pushed them away further. Sheila was unfaithful to Henry, though possibly as a reaction to seeing how much more interested he was in trains than in her. Deco was a drug addict, kicked out of the family home. It’s hard for everyone to get out of their established roles within the family. Ma and Deco argue and trade insults even as vampires are approaching to kill them. Matt, who has moved from wanting to help his brother to wanting to kill him, realises there needs to be good faith from everyone in the family if they want to build bridges.
With the vampires from the Crypt Nightclub coming for them, Deco and Matt get Ma to escape while they hold off the undead. After killing one of the Hens the two men fight Sheila. Matt’s garlic burps in her face save him, and both men then stake her from front and behind. They then find themselves trapped outside the club, surrounded by wire fences. The remaining vampires pounce but find the brothers have vanished — leaving a lit lighter on a gas canister. As it explodes, burning the vampires, Deco-Bat is flying across Dublin holding Matt. They take in the sights then land back home, delighted. Ma comes out, hugs Matt and invites Deco in for a cup of tea. Matt turns around and is faced with… BAT-BUNNY, the transformed rabbit from next door that Deco tried to eat earlier.
Mid-credits scene 1: Two men try to steal Henry’s taxi, but when they get in they’re chased off by Nat-Bat.
Mid-credits scene 2: Matt is facetiming Deco who is now living with Natalie. He’s trying to build himself a flatpack IKEA coffin (“KOFIN”).
The dead and the walking dead
Deaths and… undeaths? If you want to turn someone into a vampire, you bite them and have a little drink. If you don’t want them to come back, you have to drain their body of blood. Here they are, in order:
The real doctor. Henry, who has tracked newly-turned Vampire-Deco to the family home, kills the doctor Matt has called for his brother, then impersonates him to get into the house and stake Deco. (Dead)
Next door’s rabbit. After convincing Deco that he can slake his thirst with animal blood rather than human, Matt sneaks into the next door neighbour Frank’s house to steal his pet rabbit and feed the blood to Deco. Deco’s attempt at sucking the bunny’s blood doesn’t quite go to plan when it bites him back. Still, the rabbit is turned, as at the end of the film it appears fluttering in front of Matt in its Bat-Bunny form. (Undead)
Frank the neighbour. Coming round to retrieve his bunny, Frank gets into a fight with Deco before falling out of the window and breaking his leg on the patio below. Eventually after a tug of war over him between Deco and Matt, Deco drags Frank inside and drains him. (Dead)
Vampire-Amanda. One of Sheila’s bloodsucking Hens, she corners Matt in Ma’s shed. He fights back, cutting off all her fingers with garden shears. Eventually he kills her by removing her still-beating heart and pushes her out into her sunshine, where she starts burning. (Dead)
Deco’s girlfriend Natalie. Matt invites her round to help with Deco, but she is so impressed by the idea of vampirism she offers up her neck to be bitten and turned. Later, after an impressively energetic session with Deco, she transforms into a bat and chases Matt. He’s taken off in Henry’s taxi to save Ma from the human meat raffle at Sheila’s new nightclub. Nat-Bat manages to fly into the car, but when Matt breaks suddenly she hits the windscreen and is knocked out. She reappears in both end credits. (Undead)
Henry. He is killed by Sheila in Matt’s garden after she and two of her Hens arrive to avenge Amanda. Henry is constantly distracted by a train going by, which so infuriates Sheila she doesn’t even bite him — instead she slits his throat, then stabs him in the head as he lies dying. (Dead, as he wasn’t bitten)
Multiple vampires. As Matt and Ma try to escape the nightclub they are pursued by vampires. First Matt stakes the true raffle winner, who wants his drinks before dinner (Ma’s blood, she being the raffle prize). Then Deco appears. He’s been pouring drinks on the ground to light, and tricks the three approaching vampires that he’s caught Ma and Matt. Eventually Ma, sick of waiting for Deco to get a spark on his lighter, chucks her ciggie and the vampires burn to death. Deco and Ma argue until Matt makes them call a truce. Sheila and more vampires approach… Trapped, they send Ma upstairs to escape and run to a storeroom, fending off one of the Hens with several bottles of holy water that Matt found in Henry’s taxi. The vampire gradually burns and melts. (Dead)
Vampire-Sheila. Deco and Matt are cornered by Sheila. She is about to bite Matt when he burps last night’s garlic sauce in her face. He and Deco stake her and she explodes, leaving only a shin bone sticking out of her boot. (Dead)
The last vampires! Matt and Deco are trapped outside surrounded by wire fences. Deco transforms into a bat and flies off with Matt, leaving his lit lighter on a gas canister which explodes and kills the final vampires. (Dead)